Through The Eyes Of My Alpha

Chapter 36

Through the eyes of my alpha Chapter 36

NADIA I was trying to take in all of Riley while he sang when a surge of emotions suddenly hit me and mixed with mine. My eyes started to water as it finally dawned on me that he was sharing his emotions with me. This was the first. And I hope it will be the first of many that will come after this. We never talked about walls and boundaries, but I always shared my deepest emotions with him so he could read everything about me.

But he never did it for me.

Not until today.

And I felt his pain, his sorrow, and one thing that I was never familiar with – something that was giving me butterflies in my stomach.

It let me know that I was important to him.

I slammed my face against the nook of his neck after he positioned me on his lap.

I couldn’t fight the s**s escaping my throat.

Too many emotions, too many feelings, but what stuck with me was his pain.

“I’m sorry if I disappointed you today.

I didn’t know he would show up…” “What are you talking about?

I’m not disappointed with you.

” His voice was so calm and sweet, nothing like the way he was talking at his office earlier.

“The money… You shouldn’t have given him anything…” “Hey… Look at me.

” He moved his hands to my arms and pulled me away from his neck as his eyes caught mine.

“Don’t think about the money.

We could earn it back.

What is important is that he will never come for you again.

” “Then why are you here?

What’s bothering you?

” He took a deep breath as his eyes darted to my lips, his thumb brushing against them.

“I was having a bad moment.

I feared that you would leave me.

” “Why would you think that?

Did you think I would go with Elliot?

You must be insane to think I would want that monster over you.

” He gasped for air before he answered my question.

“Everyone that was important to me left.

And I don’t think I can handle it if you’re the one leaving me.

” “Riley…” “I love you, Nadia.

I wish I could make you stay with me for a long time.

” “I can stay forever, as long as you want me to stay.

” A smile graced my lips as I cupped his cheeks, urging him to look at me.

“I’m not Andrea.

I won’t leave you.

And if she did leave, maybe it was something more, and not because of you.

” “Caspian… Caspian is her fated mate.

” My heart jumped out of my chest.

Now I finally know why she left Riley.

There was nothing shocking about it.

But I understood now why it pained Riley, I just hoped I would be enough to fill the space she left.

“There’s nothing wrong with you then.

” His brows furrowed as confusion flitted in his eyes.

“If Caspian is her mate, then she did the right thing.

I would leave everything and everyone behind for you, Riley.

Because you’re my mate and you are meant for me.

And if you were not lying, I think you were already smitten by me when you first smelt me.

It was just perfect that Andrea found her mate before I came, otherwise, maybe I wouldn’t have had a place here.

” I pressed a finger to his heart.

“So the Goddess did play fair.

But how I wish you had waited for me instead of having a chosen.

” “Nadia…” IVAN I shook my head, smiling at him.

“I didn’t mean it in a bad way.

I just want you to know my truth.

I know this mate bond is helping a lot for you to like me or love me, but I know a part of Andrea is still there.

But I will work on it…” He was holding his breath, just looking at me, and I couldn’t fathom his emotions again.

I trailed my fingers down his chest until I reached the part where his heart was.

“Slowly, I will creep into your heart until I occupy all the space in there.

” Riley grabbed the hand on his chest and brought it to his lips, peppering it with kisses.

“I think my heart is full of you already.

If you keep pushing more, it will explode.

” I giggled and pressed my lips on his cheek, trailing it up to the edge of his ear before I whispered to him, “Then it will explode and disperse throughout your whole body… And then I can finally say I own you.

All of you.

” “You do.

Own all of me.

” He raised a hand to the nape of my neck and coiled his fingers around my hair and tugged them, causing me to softly gasp as my lips parted from his ear and his mouth trailed down my neck, licking and nibbling it.

“And you, who owns you, Nadia?

” He asked in a husky, too s**y voice that was sending tingles in between my legs.

“My s**y Alpha…” But as much as I wanted him now, I’m not done with our conversation yet.

“Wait…” I palmed his chest and pushed my body away.

He grunted but didn’t let me get away from his hold and started attacking my neck more aggressively.

“Riley…” I giggled as I tried to push him away.

“Stop…” “No…” He groaned.

His lips were now on the nook of my neck, sucking and biting the mark he had created.

“I want to know about your mother…” And that did it.

His body stiffened as his grip on me tightened.

I pulled away from him and captured his eyes.

He was frowning.

“Hey…” I smiled at him as my thumbs ran over her eyebrows, trying to flatten the curve.

“I just want to know what happened.

I can tell you about mine too, if you want.

” “There’s really not much to tell.

She left when I was a baby, so I knew nothing about her.

” “Did you bother to ask your father why she left?

” “For another man.

” “Are you angry that she left with another man, or that she left you?

” “It’s the same thing.

” “No, it is not.

” “Nadia, please…” “Did you ask your father why she didn’t take you along with her?

” “I would probably just get in her way with her lover, so she disposed of me.

” “It’s so unfair that you were judging her without hearing her side.

” “Twenty-three years, Nadia.

If she wanted me to hear her side, she could have done that within the last twenty-three years.

But there was nothing.

” “Did you try looking for her?

” “No.

” “Can we look for her?

” “No.

” “I want to look for my father.

But I didn’t even have a name.

My mother carried his name to her grave.

So I would never know him.

But you, you have a chance to get to know her.

Maybe it will make you feel better if…” He stood up abruptly, carrying me with him before he placed me on my feet and began * walking towards a tree.

When he reached the place, he leaned his palms on it and let out a deep breath.

“Enough, Nadia.

I’m done with her.

” RILEY.

“Enough, Nadia.

I’m done with her.

” “I just thought it would be nice to meet her.

Riley, I didn’t have a mother, and you too.

Maybe if we can get to meet her, who knows, maybe we’ll both end up having a mother…” “F**k, Nadia!

I said stop!

Can we move on from this?

” I was starting to get annoyed with this topic already, and if she kept insisting, I would end up walking away from here, which was the last thing I wanted to do.

I know I should have told her about Andrea.

That was my bigger problem, not my f*g mother.

I had a big opening already, but I’m a f****r too, and the moment she thought that it was only the mate bond that made Andrea leave me, I lost the courage to tell her the truth.

Now she thought I was the victim, the one left alone.

And that she, my mate, was my saving grace.

Well, she is my saving grace.

But she just had everything else wrong.

Maybe I should not feel guilty about Andrea anymore.

I heard from Alba that Andrea and Caspian were thriving well.

Well, good for them.

As long as they didn’t bother to approach my Luna, then I think I would be okay.

“It’s enough for today.

Let’s go back to the pack house.

” I turned around and started walking towards her.

“You’re not being fair.

” “I am.

I don’t need a mother.

” “But I do want one.

” “Then maybe go and find another mate who can give you a mother-in-law because I f*g don’t have one and I don’t want to have one!

” I snapped at her, and I regretted it the moment it flew out of my mouth.

I should really learn to filter my f*g mouth.

I brushed my palms over my face and let out a sigh of desperation.

“Nadia, I’m sorry.

I didn’t mean that.

I’m just not ready for her.

And I don’t want her to get in between us.

But if you want a mother figure, I could introduce you to my aunt.

She’s the Luna of the Green Valley Pack, a wonderful female.

I’m sure you will get along well.

” She was just looking at me, and I couldn’t feel any emotions coming from her.

Did she block it off?

Did she know how to?

I stepped in closer to her, coiling an arm around her waist before pulling her closer to me.

” Fine.

We will talk about her, but not now.

Or not tomorrow.

Can you just give me time to enjoy this, what we have, and not be bothered by her or anyone else?

Please, baby.

” She didn’t say anything and just nodded her head before her arms wrapped around my neck, pulling me closer for a hug.

адаад A Week After.

NADIA.

Riley told me to stop asking him about his mother.

So I did.

I stopped questioning him, but since I was naturally born stubborn, that didn’t mean I would stop seeking answers.

If he didn’t want to help me, that was fine.

I could get help somewhere else. Contentt bel0ngs to N0ve/lDrâ/ma.O(r)g!

I found out that Beta Dominic’s father was the previous Beta, so his mother was the previous Beta Female.

This means she might have actually lived with the previous Luna of this pack.

And I was right, she was indeed a good friend of hers.

So I didn’t waste any more time on getting the details that I needed.

I knew Riley would be pissed off, but I was willing to take a risk if this meant letting him move on from his bad childhood.

Because even after we kept saying how much we loved each other, I felt there was still something in between us, a wall that I couldn’t see.

And I wanted that invisible wall down.

I wanted Riley, all of him – body and soul.

‘Where are you now?

’ Riley’s words dug into my head.

‘I’m here with Katya.

’ I answered his mindlink.

I didn’t have any training sessions with Jenny today, and Riley was helping Gamma Sebastian with his Elites so I decided to spend my mornings with Beta Dominic’s mother.

So Katya and I were baking pastries while her mate went with Beta Dominic to the other side of the territory, so they could have a father and son moment even if the Beta was actually there for work ‘You’re spending too much time there.

Do I need to get jealous now?

’ I could imagine him pouting his lips, as he would usually do when he was trying to get my attention.

‘I don’t do girls.

And I don’t do anyone except my Alpha… So stop being whiny and clingy.

Aren’t you supposed to be working?

.

’ ‘I miss you.

’ I couldn’t help the smile from gracing my lips and the tingles spreading across my thighs.

His words alone could make me feel giddy.

And I was thankful Katya was standing by the sink, her back on me.

‘We just saw each other three hours ago.

’ ‘That’s been f*g too long now.

Can I pick you up already?

’ ‘No.

I’m busy.

.

.

Are you done with the Elites?

’ I waited for a response, but I didn’t hear anything.

I shrugged it off and thought that maybe he was talking with someone, but it was now a few minutes after that and still, there was nothing.

‘Riley?

’ I tried to link to him.

‘Nadia…’ His voice sounded like he was panting.

‘You just disappear.

Is everything okay?

” ‘Yes.

‘ ‘You can come here if you want.

You can watch or join me and Katya in baking some pastries.

Then we can head home together.

’ ‘Yes.

‘ ‘Okay, are you coming?

’ ‘No.

‘ My forehead creased in confusion.

What was happening?

Riley seemed to be out of his head with his answers.

‘Are you okay?

‘Yes.

Just stay there and I will pick you up.

Don’t go anywhere.

’ “Okay…So you’re coming over?

Now?

‘ ‘No.

Later, I’ll let you know when I’m coming.

’ ‘Okay.

’ He didn’t say anything more.

I counted to twenty and tried one more time.

‘Riley?

’ ‘Yes?

‘ ‘I love you.

’ ‘Me too.

That was it.

Something was off.

Riley never replied with ‘me too” every time I told him I loved him.

It would always be ‘I love you too’ and more words after that, or he would ask if I was sure that I loved him.

Something was going on where he was.

I didn’t want to bother myself with it because it might just be about the Elites, but I couldn’t stop my mind from overthinking it.

“Katya…” I finally made up my mind.

“Yes, Luna.

” “Can you drive me back to the pack house?

I know we’re not done here yet but I just remembered something I needed to do before Riley comes home later.

” I bit my lower lip, hoping she will believe me.

“Of course.

Let’s just cover all of this so it won’t get too hard when I come back.

” If she didn’t believe me I could never tell.

I helped her cover all the dough, and we both washed our hands before we headed for the door.

If Riley was hiding something, I wanted to find out what it was.

RILEY.

I waved at my Gamma and turned my body around, heading for the pack house.

I was done with my part of today’s Elite training and I couldn’t wait to shower and see my female only to remember that she wasn’t home.

She told me earlier that she would go to Katya, and my Beta drove her to his mother’s house.

It had been three hours, and I wondered if she was still there.

I was mind linking her, trying my best to flirt with her even if I wasn’t good at it.

And she kept blocking my attempts.

Probably because I could make her wet with my words and she didn’t want others to smell her arousal.

“That’s been f*g too long now.

Can I pick you up already?

’ I asked her as I turned the corner and saw Alba’s car parked in front of the pack house.

My forehead creased as I sprang towards the house, my heart thudding loudly.

What was Alba doing here?

I knew she would just come in and out of my territory without any notice, but something was telling me it was different this time.

‘No.

I’m busy… Are you done with the Elites?

’ Nadia answered.

And I was about to answer her back as I entered the pack house when a familiar scent hit me immediately.

Andrea.

F**k!

What was she doing here?

“Alba!

” I yelled for my cousin’s name as I walked to my office in big strides.

This couldn’t be true.

Not now.

Not yet.

I was about to push the door open when it suddenly opened and revealed Alba behind it.

“Miss me?

” She smiled widely, her eyebrows arching up as she stared at me.

But my eyes darted behind her; and in the middle of my office was the female I was not ready to see yet.