The Glimpse of My Past

Diane’s P. O. V.

My eyes instantly glazed at him before I found myself gracelessly smiling at him. I was not in the right mood for this, so I elbowed his stomach, and he groaned in pain.

Then, I drastically removed his arm from my shoulder and slightly stepped away from him. After all, I wasn’t used to being attached to a man’s body.

But of course, Liam was the only exception. I could snake my body to him forever.

“Hmm… what are the possible reasons that you, men, would suddenly get bored with your girlfriends?” Instead of answering his question, I asked Lorenz without even looking at him.

I was actually outside the Moonbucks Coffee Shop, holding my chocolate chip cream frap. I blankly stared at nowhere while my mind was going somewhere as I thought of Liam, so I wasn’t aware of my best friend’s sudden appearance.

“And of all people… do you really have to ask me that type of question, Diane? Seriously? Are you insulting me, bestie? Hey, I don’t even have a girlfriend!” Lorenz chuckled. “Wait, were you having problems with Liam again? You always seemed to think irrationally and act like your world was about to crumble because of him,” he stated.

Shrugging my shoulders, I just mindlessly sipped on my frappuccino’s straw. I wasn’t sure if I could cope up with our conversation without crying at all.

Soon after, Lorenz lit a cigarette right in front of me. “Hmm, to answer your question and to give my honest opinion… actually, it depends.” His face turned sour then.

“Maybe, Liam had finally realized that he was only the one who’s always exerting an effort to make your relationship work. Diane, I guessed you have to do an immediate action!” Lorenz snapped at me. Then, he puffed out his cigarette like it was nothing, and I wasn’t even in front of him.

At first, I ignored the things that he told me. I swiftly got cranky on his behavior because what I hated the most was to inhale any smoke-might it be from cigarettes, cars, or factories. What he was doing right now was adding to the pollution of the city, and I atrociously loathed it.

“Oh crap, Lorenz! And when did you learn how to smoke, huh? You’ve always known that I never liked smokes, don’t you?” I coughed after I growled. I even spanked his right arm before getting my handkerchief and covered up my nose.

But going back to my concern, I guessed Lorenz had a point on the last words he had told me earlier. Hmm, isn’t that how Liam truly feels? Because he was so generous to give everything in our relationship?

From all the days that God allowed us to be together, it was always Liam who used to surprise and make an effort for the two of us. I only ended up being madly in love, fascinated, and awestruck by everything he does.

I couldn’t even remember if I was able to give Liam at least one gift during our monthly celebrations. He was at all times the first one to greet me because the truth was, I actually forgot the exact date when we became lovers. He was showering me gifts almost every day, so how could I exactly remember? 

It was every seventh day of the month when he would greet me, so I guessed I answered him on September 7 last year. It seemed like my brain was full of toxins which supposed to be cleansed. I was so naive, and my ill-tempered attitude right now was provoking me to crack my head wide open.

“I’m sorry, bestie! I’ve just been stressed out lately because of Daddy. You know what? He wanted to trap me in an arranged marriage. What the fuck, Diane! It’s just like I wanted to be gay again, but this time, I should pretend in front of Dad!” His nostrils flared, and Lorenz couldn’t seem to hold his rants.

He moved a little away from me before continuing to puff his cigarette. “Tsk, because of my Karen… I mean, our best friend, who just got a job in Cebu, never came back here! Did you know when she would be coming back, huh? She wasn’t even joining our group chat lately, and it has been weeks!”

Unable to open my lips to answer him, I ended up shaking my head. I missed Karen so much and I wondered how she had been dealing with her cousin, Ernest, and the rest of her family.

“Here’s my plan-I would present her to Dad as my supposed-to-be girlfriend, and I don’t care anymore how she would react to it. Damn, she wouldn’t even answer any of my calls! Please tell her to come back as soon as possible because I was running out of time, and I might not be able to wait for her.” Lorenz’s face creased while referring to Karen.

I just nodded at him while sliding the handkerchief back into my pocket.

“But let me change the topic, Diane. Did you and Liam encounter some problems again? Had I told you not to overthink things and not to jump to conclusions so easily? Tell me, what happened then?” he asked again. Just when I thought that Karen would be the center of our conversation, I was wrong.

Instead of answering him, I only used my free hand, brushed my hair up, and did not speak. I was frustrated about what was happening around and why Liam had suddenly disappeared. 

With tensed muscles on my jaws and neck, I let out a deep sigh in response to Lorenz. Then, I ended up pouting my lips. I couldn’t help myself but be mad. I remained silent while my best friend was still smoking the hell out when my cellular phone suddenly rang.

Maybe, Liam was the one calling! my mind squealed out of excitement.

My heart elatedly throbbed as I beamed and literally jumped for joy. I quickly opened my bag and hurriedly picked up my cell phone to answer the call. I even dropped some of my makeup kits and sanitizer that Lorenz just picked up and handed over.

But since I was so busy at the moment, he did me a favor to just put those things inside my open bag, and I murmured my thanks to him for doing that. I felt so stirred to answer the call, only to be somehow disappointed when I saw my phone’s screen. Tension ruled my body, eventually deleting the happiness I felt for a minute.

The caller was not my boyfriend. It made me roll my eyes and secured my lips tightly.

Damn! How could he do this to me? How could he bear not to make himself known to me these past few days? How could he not send me even a single message? I bitterly asked myself.

My shoulders were drooping low as I swallowed the lump on my throat. I was disappointed, but I should remember that my love for him should be of greater value.

Almost falling off-balance, Lorenz was quick enough to support my back. It felt like I wanted to cry now, but I blinked back to keep my tears from welling up. 

“H-Hello, Dave?” I tried to clear my voice because I didn’t want my brother to have a hint of my problem.

I wasn’t disappointed that my brother called. Perhaps, it was because my expectation of Liam being the caller was indeed too adamant. I guessed next time-I should follow the golden rule for me not to be hurt. Do not ever expect and never assume! Love doesn’t hurt, disappointment does.

“Hello, big sis? Are you on your way home?” David asked from the other line.

“Hmm, kind of… why?” I asked him back.

“Ah, okay then-” that was all he could say, and my brother turned off the call. 

“Hey, Dave! Wait-” I tried to reach out to him and make our phone conversation longer, but he didn’t even take time to properly bid his goodbye to me. I ended up puzzlingly looking at my phone’s screen.

Sometimes, I couldn’t get that brother of mine! He called, but he soon turned off the call like it was just nothing for him. What was his problem? Was he broken-hearted again? Did he really have the nerve to drop his phone on me?

Alright, David Cristoff! Get ready for me as soon as I get home.

Biting my lower lip, I became even more irritated as if I wanted to get lost here and shout on top of my lungs. I lopsidedly shook my head while placing the cell phone back in my bag.

Then, I slurped from the frap’s straw right away. Exasperated, I consumed it all in just one sip. I closed my eyes while trying to calm myself, but I ended up scratching my head, messing up with my hair again.All content © N/.ôvel/Dr/ama.Org.

It felt like everything was disoriented, and I couldn’t process them. I wasn’t good at solving puzzles, but Liam seemed hard to be solved these past few weeks.