Uncertain Thoughts
RENEE
“Girl, I’ll be damned if this man doesn’t love you. Just look at the gifts. Oh girl, I say you’ve hit the jackpot with this one.”Property belongs to Nôvel(D)r/ama.Org.
Staring mindlessly at the couple art notebook Robert gifted me and the lone tulip flower attached to the wrapped package, I didn’t say a word as Nicole went on and on.
Another cryptic note was attached to the presents, but I wasn’t ready to read it.
Instead, I stared blankly at everything sprawled out on the bed. I rubbed my forehead, unsure of what to do.
“Aren’t you going to say anything? Damn, look at this. So romantic and sensual. He imagined both of you when he bought this.” Nicole said, picking up the art book. “The pictures are out of this world, though the gift is strange. Robert Clarke is very thoughtful. I’ll give him that.”
“You think?” I mumbled, staring at the picture Nicole showed me, and my eyes glazed over the sensual black-and-white art.
It was a drawing of a naked silhouetted man and woman in bed, tangled with the sheets.
The man had his hands on the woman’s bare thighs. If I were to describe the scene, the man was trying to get his hands into-
“Hey! Did you hear me?” Nicole’s loud voice cut into my thoughts, and I shook my head vigorously.
“What is it? What did you ask me?”
“The note…” She began, picking up the card and handing it to me, “Aren’t you going to read it and see what it says?”
“I’m not ready to re-”
“Take it, and read it. Or else I’ll be forced to do that on your behalf.” Nicole interjected, shoving the card into my palms. My shoulders dropped dejectedly as I took it.
I smiled the second my eyes saw Robert’s familiar cursive handwriting and I read the letter aloud so Nicole could hear what he’d sent.
He began the letter with a soothing romantic poem, and my heart doing a flip, I laughed when I got to the end of the letter.
He was apologizing, yet again, for sending me gifts.
It was like he was in my head, and he knew how the thought of him stalking me creeped me out, but here he was, begging for forgiveness.
This man…
‘…Check the back of the card. I left something there for you.’
This was the second to last sentence, preceding his signature R initial, alongside kiss emojis.
Sharply, without waiting to think of what might be there, my eyes dropped in disappointment when I saw he’d only written three numbers on the back-two, five, and six.
“What’s there?” Nicole asked all too eagerly, her eyes lighting as she shifted toward where I was seated on the mattress.
“Some number or…?”
“Numbers?”
“Yes.”
“Oh, wow.”
“What?” I questioned.
She had a wicked glint in her eyes. Without saying a word, she stood up from the bed and walked to our shared mini wardrobe.
“What are you doing, Nicole?” I asked. But she said nothing and kept searching through the wardrobe.
Finally, she stopped rummaging and turned around. She started walking toward me, gift bag in hand.
It was the same gift Robert had given me some days ago.
“Guess what I’m thinking?” Nicole asked, cutting through my thoughts.
I rolled my eyes.
“I have no idea, Nicole. Why are you holding that gift bag? Is there something I should know?” I asked with raised brows, and she nodded excitedly.
I didn’t say another word. Instead, I watched as she scattered the gift bag contents on the bed, bringing out the first note he’d given me since I arrived home in Orlando.
“Remember the letter he gave you yesterday? He hinted that you keep the cards because there’s something vital about them, right?”
“Yes, yes. I remember.” I agreed.
Clearing her throat, Nicole continued, “Well, I think he’s talking about these numbers. See here…” She continued, turning the first note, and I spotted three different numbers.
“Huh? What does this mean? What is he trying to do?” I asked, confused. Nicole just smiled at me.
“You still don’t get it, do you?” She asked and I shook my head no.
I had no idea what she was hinting at.
What did these numbers mean?
“You know a cell phone number contains ten different digits, right? He’s sent six, so we have four unknown numbers left. Do you think he’ll send the remaining numbers with gifts too? He did tell you to keep the cards. Do you think this could be the reason?” Nicole asked, her questions running through my head.
Her suspicions were realistic.
That was it. Or was there something more to these numbers?
“Oh jeez… I’m just so confused now, Nicole.” I sighed and added, “Did I tell you that someone was watching me while I worked at the restaurant today?”
“What?”
“Yes, Nicole. I could feel their stare drilling a hole in my skin.”
“Oh my, Renee! Well, I don’t know what to say. He sends you these gifts but also stalks you.”
“He might not be the one stalking me, though. Even though I’m convinced he’s in the city, I don’t know if he’s the person watching me or not. Maybe it’s the investigator he hired or something. Honestly, I’m just baffled by this whole thing.”
“Calm down, girl.” Nicole said softly. Trying to calm my raging thoughts, she placed a hand on my hair, caressing it.
“I had to cut our yacht trip short because of this same issue, Nicole. This stalking, investigation thingy, and now he’s doing it again. Why can’t he call me, and then we talk things out? Why send me mysterious gifts? Worse still, why is he making it so difficult for me to forget him? The thing between us was supposed to be a one-night stand, not….”
“Chill, Renee, chill. Relax. You’re overthinking yourself and just whining now. Look…” Nicole started, clearing her throat at the same time. “You say he could’ve just called you, but at the same time, would you have answered if he did? If he’d reached out to you a few days after you left Miami, would you have picked up?”
“Huh?”
“Don’t huh me Renee. Just answer.”
“Well, I don’t know. Maybe I would have, or…? Honestly, I wouldn’t have picked it up. Cause I was still mad at him even though I missed him. Gosh.”
“You see. You’re waffling again. Think straight, and get your shit together.”
“I’m trying my best to get my shit together here!” I blurted out harshly. “I’m trying my freaking best. I don’t like the idea of him watching me from a distance, and I’m still trying to be calm. So don’t tell me to get my fucking shit together, ’cause I’m trying.”
“I know you are. Well, it does sound creepy, but at the same time, it’s nice that he’s making an effort. If Robert’s in Orlando as you think he is… Then all I can say is that man has it bad for you. I don’t think this is some post-nut clarity thing anymore, and age gap asides, I can bet he’s obsessed with you. He doesn’t live in Orlando, for God’s sake, but he might be here cause of you. If this is not enough reason why you should calm down and get perspective, then I don’t know what is.”
“But-” I began.
“I’m not supporting his actions, but damn, I won’t lie when I tell you that these mysterious expensive as fuck gifts are a huge turn-on for me. Oh, how I wish I were the one living this right now.”
“Trust me when I tell you that you would wish for something else if you were in my shoes.” I joked, and she just laughed.
“Well, enough about Mr. R. Can we talk about something else, or should we call it a night? I’m no longer hungry, and I could doze off any minute from now.”
“No, not really.” I mumbled, and taking that as a cue to get ready for bed, Nicole began to pack away the gifts.
As I watched her arrange her bed, I remembered a certain gist that I’d forgotten to tell her.
“Nicole.” I called out when she placed her head on the pillow and she turned to face me.
“Yes?”
“Can you believe that Dylan tried calling me today?”
“Huh?” Her droopy eyes flew open, and she sat upright instantly Her quick movement made me giggle.
If there was one thing about my best friend, it was that she loved gossip, and she certainly had a mouth for it.
“Well, he called, but I didn’t pick and….”
As I continued to narrate the rest of my day to Nicole, my mind kept wandering back to thoughts of Robert, and I couldn’t help but wonder what he was up to.