BEST FRIEND’S BROTHER

He thrust harder this time and she felt the shudder roll through his body as he held himself deep inside her. He kissed her. Hungry. Passionate. With more desperation than she’d ever experienced from him. Their lovemaking had always been good, but he’d never lost control so quickly.

She kissed him with just as much hunger, her hands sliding down his back and then up again to hold his head to hers.

His hips trembled against her. They lay locked together, with him barely holding himself off her. Wanting that closeness to him-especially now- she urged him over to his side, rolling with him so they stayed together.

Their limbs were tangled, their arms wrapped tightly around each other, and he was still pulsing deep inside her body. She tucked her head underneath his chin and breathed deeply of his scent, felt the erratic thump of his heart against her cheek.

It was easy to forget all that had happened between them. It was easy to forget the pain and loneliness. It was easy to imagine that they’d never been apart and that they were home in bed, just waking in their apartment. And just for a moment, she refused to allow the hazy euphoria to evaporate under the weight of reality.

————–

Two weeks later Sasha walked into Kaleb’s room some time in the night.

“Kaleb!” she hissed urgently, shaking his shoulder. “I think I felt something!”

Kaleb felt himself stir. “Mmm. So did I!” he murmured sleepily.

Sasha almost laughed, “I’m serious!” she said.

Moving swiftly out of the memory, he sat up in bed, his eyes snapping open. “You mean it’s the baby?”

“I’m not sure.”

He frowned. “It can’t be! There’s still another three weeks to go.”

“It could be. Babies come early.”

“Get in the bed and Keep still, then.” He said as he helped her get on the bed, slid his arms around her shoulders and cuddled her against him, loving the feel of her bulky stomach pressed up this close to him. “And we’ll wait and see.” He gave the top of her head a perfunctory kiss. “Okay?”

“Okay.”

They both held their breath almost without realizing they were doing so, then let it out in unison as nothing happened. He stroked her hair and slid a hair-roughened thigh over hers.

“I guess we just wait. I can’t think of a nicer way to do it.”

“Me, neither.” She nestled against his bare chest, so comfortable in his arms.

Kaleb lay in silence for a moment, just listening to the sounds of the evening-the ticking of a clock in the room and the distant hum of a car outside. There were things he wanted to tell her, but he wondered if now was the right time. Maybe there never would be a right time.

“What is it?” she murmured sleepily against his chest.

“How do you know it’s anything?” He smiled in the darkness.

“You tensed up your shoulders-the way you always do when you want to say something you find difficult,”

He thought about this. “You know me pretty well now, don’t you, Sasha?”

Sasha felt protected by the cloak of darkness, and secure enough to say what was on her mind. “I think I always have done. Only I never felt your equal before.”

“But you do now?”

“Oh, yes.”

He took a deep breath, “Don’t worry about it,” he said.

Sasha decided not to push him. She forced her thoughts away from the topic. “You know, we still haven’t talked about what’s going to happen after the birth.” She said instead.

“Because we agreed we wouldn’t try to predict the future. Especially not about the important things.” Kaleb replied.

“And what are the important things? The baby is going to be born soon-maybe sooner than either of us think. Surely we’re close enough to the future now for me to ask you a question like that.”

He scowled, knowing now another reason why they had always avoided the subject. Too painful.” Well, most important to me is how often I get to see the baby, I guess.”

“You mean access arrangements?” she asked.

Kaleb nodded, wincing in the darkness at the coldness of the phrase. “We can have a lawyer draw up some kind of formal agreement, if you’d prefer.”

Sasha took her head from his chest and leaned over him, even though she could only see the smoky gleam of his eyes in the dim light. “Is that what you want?”

He laughed, only it didn’t sound bubbling, or humorous. “I don’t think what I want is relevant.”

“Of course it is!” she said fiercely. “You’re the father!”ConTEent bel0ngs to Nôv(e)lD/rama(.)Org .

“But only the biological father!” he snarled.

“What other kind is there?”

“The real kind! The kind that wipes his nose when he gets a cold. Or kicks a ball around in the park with him. The kind that shows him how to ride a bike without falling off and how to deal with bullies when they pick on you!”

“And what if we have a girl?” asked Sasha.

“Exactly the same!” He scowled. “And don’t try to be clever or change the subject, Sasha Sullivan! You blithely talk about what it would be like if I was with another woman-don’t you ever give a thought to what it would be like for me if you were with another man? Will I have to stand and watch from the sidelines while he or she…. ” he corrected hurriedly, “…. calls another man Daddy? I don’t think I could stand it” he finished ferociously.

“Why are we arguing about a mythical man I might never meet at a time like this?” she asked him. “I thought we have been enjoying a mutually satisfactory experience-”

He sighed. “That’s just the problem. We have.”

“And? How is that a problem?”

“It makes me realize how much I… want you.” It didn’t seem quite the right word, but it would do for now. “I want you even more now than ever before, Sasha.”

He was right-the sex always changed everything. Sasha had a sneaking suspicion that sometimes men’s minds and women’s minds were heading in the same direction -only taking two entirely different routes to get there. She loved him. She knew that. She thought that deep down he felt the same way about her. But she wasn’t going to put words in his mouth, however much she wanted to hear them.

“You mean you want us to keep having sex regularly?” she asked casually.